Awake in Darkness

Woke up at 3:30. That’s the a.m. version. No odd noises disturbed my sleep. It wasn’t because I’d been dreaming of the ocean and now had to pee really bad. It wasn’t the cat needing to be fed. It wasn’t Skook knocking on the window because he’d lost his keys again. It wasn’t Nizzibet doing the Disco Inferno in her sleep.

Just one of those mornings where I was wide awake at an hour that I rarely experience while conscious. So I fed the cat, used the bathroom and went back to bed. Snuggled up to the Nizz for another 40 minutes before I finally got it through my head that I wasn’t going back to sleep. Just didn’t feel like it.

Found out last week that an old friend had killed himself. Found out yesterday that another old friend has probably only got another week to live. Nizzibet and I have been looking into getting life insurance. Had nurses over two weekends in a row to get blood and urine samples. But it’s not thoughts of mortality waking me at 3:30.

Whatever it was, I’m up. Might as well draw.